I think it was the Taaka that faakad me...

It seems that lately I've had way too many opportunities for sabotage. I've been hanging out with girls from work a lot, and then trying to have a weekly Kona happy hour trip with my other girl friends. I'm not going to back out of a good time with friends, but I do need to be a little more careful about my food and beverage choices, I guess.

Last night was ridiculously fun! One of the girls I work with lives in the same neighborhood as me. I get a text from another girl who used to work at LAH saying to come down the street for martinis. So, I head over on my bike. A couple of hours of good fun later, it's time to go home. Alisha gets this brilliant idea to try to shove my bike in her backseat. Her boyfriend says hell no, and pulls it out. Then we decide we're going to ride my bike together back to my house since she wants to make sure I get home ok (we're both hammered!). So, picture this - 2 short, small drunk girls riding down the street screaming on a bike made for one person. It was HILARIOUS! At least to us, it was! lol! We get to my house, pile into my car, and Michael drives her back to her house. There are lots of fun details in between, but I can't even remember them all - just that it was a good time! :) Going back and looking at the few pics that I took made it even better. lol

Shopping Issues

Saturday, I went shopping at the Macy's 1-Day sale. I had a gift card and figured I could use some new work clothes (and get Michael a shirt and tie for work as well). I started sifting through the racks, grabbing what little I found that I thought might work for me. I even grabbed a couple of pairs of Lucky jeans in size 28. I finally make it to the dressing room, and every single thing (minus a small sweater top) was too big. Everything I grabbed was a size 6, and none of it fit. The freaking jeans didn't even fit!! They were hanging off of me! So, I still tried it all on so that I could get an idea of what might actually work for me in a smaller size. I go back, switch out for size 4s, grab a few new things (in size 6 since they looked to be cut smaller). I said to hell with the jeans though. Once I got back in the dressing room, I found several pairs of pants and tops that I liked enough. Of course, the few size 6 items I picked up needed to be swapped for size 4. For some reason I could not get it in my head that I needed a smaller size. Finally, I make my selections and head to the scanner to see what my total will be. Two things I picked up were on sale (not even a good sale), and the rest was regular priced. AGHHHH! So, now I decide on 2 pairs of pants (since that's what I REALLY needed), and a short-sleeved sweater top. This was all I ended up with after 1 1/2 hours of shopping. I think that maybe I don't shop well by myself.... I never seem to find anything unless I'm with my mom or girlfriends. :(

I have some beef with this shopping trip. Not because I needed smaller sizes, but because I almost feel like the joke's on me? Department stores cater to "bigger" women. I have ALWAYS found myself in smaller sizes in the department stores. I guarantee that if I have walked down to Buckle and grabbed a size 28 Lucky jean, it would not have been hanging off of me like the ones in Macy's. That's what is aggravating. I don't want to walk around saying I'm a size 4, when I'm really not. I'm just a size 4 in the department stores that are cut for bigger women. I my head, I knew what size I was and after the first part of shopping, it was really a tease to get in the dressing room. I also realize the flip side of if I had fit those 6s that I would really be bigger, but that's not the point. Why can't the designers all get together and decide on a set of measurements that they are going to use when determining sizes?! I hate that my work clothes can be 2-4 and my going-out clothes are anywhere from a 4-8. It sucks.

My battle with the scale..

I'm pretty sure that this ritualistic morning bathroom war with my scale will never end.

Last month I hit my lowest weight so far - 125.4. Maybe I was dehydrated...maybe it was a fluke....or maybe it's the fact that I had several days worth of horrible eating from plans with family and friends immediately afterward, but I have yet to get back down to that weight or lower. I went right back to my 127-128 range. I have been maintaining right there for what feels like forever now. Don't get me wrong; I'm very happy to be at this weight, but I want better. I have the hang of maintaining my weight now. I just want to lose a few more pounds, tone up, and then go back to maintaining. :)

Last night was Girls' Nights at the Melting Pot with some co-workers. Then we hit the Texas Club (yeah, yeah, I know. :P). I made sure to monitor my calories all day so that I only ate around 800-900 calories, plus I rode 7 miles before we went out. I figured that even if I only grazed at the Melting Pot, the alcohol would do me in on calories. So anyway...we had a great time and danced the night away. I get up this morning and weighed in at 126.8. I really, really, REALLY hope this is a break in my plateau. I've been trying to up my calories like Beth told me and net around 1400. It's been hard because I've been so used to eating less, but I'm trying to eat every 2 hours or so to help keep me from getting too full and then not eating the rest of the day because I feel so miserable.

One thing I'm trying to teach myself regarding the scale is that it lies - it really does. Even though I've been maintaining my weight, my body is still changing. I went and spent way too much on my first pair of designer jeans at Buckle the other day (about 2-3 weeks ago). I was so happy to have a ridiculously great fitting pair of jeans, and now they're too big. I mean, I can slip into them comfortably but after about an hour, they stretch a little and become baggy. I assume that boot camp is what has done it since that's the only thing (well, and I've taken up biking too...) I've really done with my work-outs since I bought the damn things. On one hand I'm really happy, but on the other I'm pissed I spent so much and now they can be my "fat jeans". I wasn't very sure on how to figure the sizes out since they're European, but I passed a rack of Lucky jeans yesterday and they had American sizes in their jeans along with the European. So, I guess now I'm a 28 European/6 American. I have come to terms with the fact that I will never slip into a size 2 in jeans since I have such a big ass in proportion to my height. I actually like my big ass and the curves it gives me, though; so I guess it's cool. :)

It's kind of funny how people view exercise sometimes..

Yesterday and today had me thinking about how I used to view diet and exercise. Actually, what really sparked my thoughts was an infomercial. (I have a sick addiction to them. lol) I took a nap and ended up being wide awake at midnight. I decided to let the TV play in the background while I read NROLFW. Of course, I paused a few times as ads for the Jack LaLanne Power Juicer (does that thing really work, and is juicing really all that great for you??) and other random scams passed by. Then one of them came on that was really cheesy. I forget the name of the program, but the guy on it was claiming that you could get the perfect body from his system. I started thinking back when I ordered the "Slim in 6" program and Windsor Pilates. Back then 5 or 6 weeks was WAAAY too long for me to be stuck in a program to get in shape. That was just ridiculous to me. LOL! My how things have changed.

I am currently doing a Boot Camp program at the gym that lasts for 5 weeks. It may go on longer (the poster she has for our point standings goes into June), but definitely through the end of May. I'm actually going to miss several sessions because of the cruise for my cousin's bachelorette party, but I plan to make those up. I wish this session was going to last for 8 weeks, but Beth is pregnant and this is the last Boot Camp for the year so that she can take off for the baby. It's funny to think of the way I used to view the length of time I was willing to give to get into shape. Seriously, a week or 2 MAX. People who already take care of themselves and are athletic don't even do that.

Once I get back from the cruise and Boot Camp is over, I am going to start doing NROLFW. That is a six month program - the longest I will have ever done. I'm excited to start it, and very nervous as well. I am trying to get over the fad ideas that have been ingrained in me from health magazines and media hype, and reteach myself more realistic goals according to this book. He makes a lot of great points, but it's so different from what I've seen and heard everywhere else. This is a long-term program, and that's exactly what I need. Most of what you see and hear regarding diet and exercise revolves around a short-term goal - nothing you would stick with forever. Granted, I may move on to other plans after this one; it all depends on how well it works for me and my lifestyle.

Anyway, I just wanted to share the funny little thoughts I had from watching infomercials the other night. It's crazy to think that there are many people out there who think the way I used to. Hopefully they will come to the same conclusions I did about health and fitness instead of continuing to view them as a short-term fix for their long-term problems.