Le sigh

Where did we leave off?  Ideal Protein? Oh yeah...

So, with a few scheduling conflicts, I missed a couple of Ideal Protein appointments.  That threw everything off.  Then, I switched jobs and no longer had a convenient way to get over to Ascension.  I had Byron pick up my shakes for a week, but realized that the accountability was just gone.  Then, Michael's grandmother passed away...  I still have some Ideal Protein products that I plan to use, but I definitely fell off that wagon.

So, here we are.  I'm not completely back at square one, but it sure feels like it.  I gained about 5-7lbs back from the 17lbs I had lost.

Over the last 2-3 weeks, I've been Spinning and running 2-3 times per week - not consistently enough for my liking.  When I'm in a good routine, I like to have solid work-outs at least 4 times a week, usually 5.  That is what I need to get back to.  However, my diet is going to be the hardest part for me.  I feel like I have some terrible habits to break.  I snack late at night, for one.  I feel like I eat way too much at any given sitting.  I need to bust out some major portion control - which started this morning.  I picked up a non-fat latte and breakfast sandwich from Starbucks this morning.  They were out of the egg white and spinach wrap I really like, so I opted for an egg and cheese sandwich.  I was SHOCKED at the calorie difference when I sat down to look.  I only ate half of my sandwich and put the rest in the fridge so that I could have it tomorrow morning. 
I'm also working on my water intake.  I have a 24oz cup I bring with me every.single.day, but I feel like I rarely finish it.  My goal is to drink two full cups before lunch, and shoot for another one after.  We don't keep sodas in the house (unless we are planning for company), so I usually get at least 8-16oz of water with dinner.

I guess I just haven't really looked in the mirror enough to be bothered over the past month.  I saw pictures from a party this past weekend, and I was nauseated at how I look now.  I guess it's easy to put it out of your mind when you have so many other wonderful things going on in your life to focus on.  I am so happy everywhere else in my life, so I feel like I've been able to put this one negative thing away.  That has to end once and for all.  I cannot allow myself to get pregnant again until my health is back where it needs to be.